Keep Carrying On
I read your profile today and noticed how your beginning line is about honesty. I can certainly give you that by saying that it’s the most ridiculous thing to think that just after such a short time getting to know you, and a few days not talking to you – that I could actually miss you.
I am good, really good, at only making a minimal investment of emotion into building relationships through dating. I think it’s something innate that reminds me that even though my heart is big, my time is not; that’s my reality. So, when I realized that you pulling away bothered me, I was surprised and recognized that I let you affect me. So, my point (other than writing incessantly) is just to be honest.
Being silent isn’t the character I saw; you were upstanding to tell me about wanting to try and rekindle something with someone else, you would send a random text or surprise me with a phone call to stay in touch and you initiated apologies for long delays, but you weren’t ever silent. A lot of things could explain why you have disappeared, and likely it has nothing to do with me; but guessing is foolish. (And we already know that my psychic mind reading skills are bunk!)
So, I don’t know what next for us, if anything. I had a lot of fun with you! If I am in a relationship someday, I will want someone who is as interesting, brilliant, sexy and as tenacious as you are – and who wants me, even prefers me. Life seems to pick up speed as kids grow, and we get older. So, as I said before, I will continue to carry on, enjoy life and just hope whatever is keeping you busy is also making you happy.
I hadn’t heard from E in several days. So, I wrote him the following memo (what a dork) and sent it to him. One thing I always loved about E is that he continued to be open to something about US, no matter how many ridiculous notes I sent him.